I've been struggling with the choices I made.
Not recent ones. Choices that I made a long time ago. Choices that in a certain way, pre determined my current existence.
It is said that after a certain age (excuse me for not remembering but something like 50 years old) you stop collecting your previous life's Karma and you start to collect your current life's one.
With all the limitations concerning any assessment of what we have done before, I still try to figure out what has led me here, to this moment, to this place, where I stand and struggle.
Observing our surroundings I unveil such an immense world full of extremes and opposites. A world capable of the highest joys along with the highest cruelty. Seeing, feeling, merging in a flow of highs and lows, love and hatred, wisdom and ignorance. This is the world we created. This is the place my Karma brought me to.
Why?
This apparently complex question is still far from being answered since any attempt to logically find any meaning or connection between our distant past and the present has basically failed. All that rests is a feeling, that sixth sense, that tries to tell me about connections, about familiarities, about comfort. This sixth sense that is like a candle in someone's hand trying to find one's way through a dark cave, that carries me through this life with a trembled certainty that I am in the right place. And even though I do not agree with a lot of things, they are as they have to be and for sure they shape me into what I need to become.
This is what I have, and it is what will set me free. As hard and painful as it might be.
I'll prevail.
Not recent ones. Choices that I made a long time ago. Choices that in a certain way, pre determined my current existence.
It is said that after a certain age (excuse me for not remembering but something like 50 years old) you stop collecting your previous life's Karma and you start to collect your current life's one.
With all the limitations concerning any assessment of what we have done before, I still try to figure out what has led me here, to this moment, to this place, where I stand and struggle.
Observing our surroundings I unveil such an immense world full of extremes and opposites. A world capable of the highest joys along with the highest cruelty. Seeing, feeling, merging in a flow of highs and lows, love and hatred, wisdom and ignorance. This is the world we created. This is the place my Karma brought me to.
Why?
This apparently complex question is still far from being answered since any attempt to logically find any meaning or connection between our distant past and the present has basically failed. All that rests is a feeling, that sixth sense, that tries to tell me about connections, about familiarities, about comfort. This sixth sense that is like a candle in someone's hand trying to find one's way through a dark cave, that carries me through this life with a trembled certainty that I am in the right place. And even though I do not agree with a lot of things, they are as they have to be and for sure they shape me into what I need to become.
This is what I have, and it is what will set me free. As hard and painful as it might be.
I'll prevail.
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